In today’s fast paced world of technology, media and negativity our children are living in a very different world compared to 20 years ago. Children at a very young age have a huge amount of pressure to succeed. They also lead very busy lives with homework, extra murals, therapies, social engagements etc. When it comes to exam time, there is even more pressure on them as many schools weight the exam mark to count for a high percentage of the term mark.
Fear of failure, worry and anxiety create negative thought patterns which cause a negative outcome regardless of how much preparation and studying your children done. You can help to decrease stress levels in your child and yourself through the exam process by following these four EQ Steps –
1. The Situation
2. Think
3. Do
4. Be
Step 1: The Situation
Ask your child what their worries are about their exams. The example is the child says they are worried about not being able to finish the exam on time.
Step 2: Think
Find a quiet place for you and your child to sit or lie, ask them to close their eyes and imagine themselves finishing the exam in time. They should create a picture in their imagination with as much details as possible i.e. sights, sounds, feelings
Step 3: Do
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Kicking out the Grouch and bringing in the love thought
If a child is constantly worrying and thinking about the fact that they will fail the exam, then that is what might happen. Help them reframe the “grouch” or negative about the exam with any positive thought, feeling ie “When my exams are finished it means that holidays are near”. This starts to create a positive associate and perception towards exams going forward.
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Create Affirmations
Help them to think of a positive statement about their worry e.g “ I always finish my exams on time.”
They should write the statement on a piece a paper in positive language and practice saying this statement each day. They can say them quietly; they can shout them or sing them
Step 4: Be
By practicing visualising the outcomes, changing the grouch thoughts to love thoughts and saying positive affirmations regularly creates positive behavioural change to challenges going forward.
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One Response
Hi can you also help parents of kids who are also writing exams themselves. I am really battling with mine, don’t know whether there are anyone else as well.
Thank you