By Fatima Kazee, mum to a professor, a super hero and a little princess. Part-time wife to a fanatical fisherman. She’s addicted to sneakers anything chocolatey & is an invaluable member of the Jozikids team
Being a mom of 3 kids all under the age of 6 is no easy task! And somehow there is no way to fully prepare yourself for the journey you and your spouse are about to embark on. Other parents may give you advice and your own mom will tell you how it was when you were young. But somehow the world has evolved so much in such a short space of time (I was born in the 80’s so I’m not that old) that all the advice just doesn’t fit anymore. Kids of today are busier, they need more stimulation and lives are more hectic than before – my sons’ favourite line is ‘I’m bored, what can I do now?’ This after he just built a town out of Lego’s, played playstation for an hour, watched tv for half an hour, helped me bake a cake and went outside for another hour.
Being at home full-time means that I’m around for a lot more – meal times, bath times, homework, nap time – the list is actually endless. I have no time for myself (apart from my great part-time job at jozikids), no peace in anything I do (including going to the toilet, showering, talking on the phone, eating cold food, drinking cold tea!) and not a single minute during the day to just sit and think clearly. And don’t even mention how I’d love to join the gym and actually go to it or just go shopping without a trolley full of whining kids! Motherhood really is something that takes getting used to and I think, practice makes perfect (ok maybe not perfect but better).
It’s a constant battle, feeling like nothing you do is ever good enough, comparing to other mothers (although I am one of those that had natural birth, breastfed for 18 months each and never slept a full night’s sleep for the past 6 years!). I do however feel that the best decision I made was to stay home with my kids. I believe that the world is becoming rather strange, twisted and maybe even sick and there’s nothing I can do about that. But what I can do is make sure that I am there as much as I can to teach my children about good morals, about the value of life, good manners and the basics that every child is entitled to. I don’t believe that I can leave that in the hands of someone else, no matter how qualified. There are certain things I feel that children need from their own parents and there is no room for compromise. It’s a sacrifice well worth making.
The truth is is that motherhood is exhausting; it saps the life (and youthfulness) out of you. It can be frustrating, overwhelming, unrewarding at times and never-ending! And I am most certainly not the type of person that will say it brings me joy to watch my kids sleeping – hell I’m just glad they’re asleep finally! But they are a blessing that was entrusted to me to nurture, protect, care for and always strive my best for and I wouldn’t change that for the world. They bring joy and laughter into each day and that’s what makes it all worth it. And I feel it is in the best interests of each and every child to have his/her mother available 24/7 so that he may grow up to be a content, fulfilled, loved, cared for and well-rounded individual that has value to add to the society that he lives in – because a mothers love is not replaceable.
“Paradise lies under the feet of mothers.” – Islamic Hadith