{"id":19312,"date":"2022-05-07T13:00:35","date_gmt":"2022-05-07T11:00:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.jozikids.co.za\/zaparents-blog\/?p=19312"},"modified":"2022-06-13T20:21:41","modified_gmt":"2022-06-13T18:21:41","slug":"giving-myself-credit-for-being-a-real-mum","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jozikids.co.za\/blog\/parenting\/moms-mothers-single-mothers-being-a-mom\/giving-myself-credit-for-being-a-real-mum\/","title":{"rendered":"Giving myself credit for being a REAL mum"},"content":{"rendered":"

I\u2019m one of those real mums.\u00a0 You know those that will admit to being short tempered, impatient and sarcastic at times. \u201cMum, can you carry my school bag please?\u201d This while I\u2019m carrying all 7 shopping bags up the stairs to save me a trip down again. \u201cYes sure, just put it on my head why don\u2019t you?\u201d\u00a0 The one that will totally lose her mind when her kid comes to her at 8pm with 10 math sums for tomorrow. I don\u2019t even try<\/em> to hold back the fire-breathing dragon part of me and you know why? Because this is real life, I\u2019m allowed to get mad and hopefully that teaches them a lesson about procrastination.<\/span><\/p>\n

But then, a lot of the time I wonder if this is detrimental to my kids? I have 3 kids and each of them has a few friends. So I am often in contact with quite a few other mums and parents and I\u2019ve been observing them all for a couple of years now.<\/span><\/p>\n

The Stepford Mum<\/span><\/h2>\n

This mum is always soft spoken, never a bad word out her mouth.\u00a0 Always calm, her hair is so neat and she bakes the best choc chip cookies ever.<\/span><\/p>\n

The Corporate\u00a0 Mum\u00a0<\/span><\/h2>\n

This mum has all her ducks in a row (while my ducks occasionally start with an F), her son\u2019s projects are of boardroom quality and she hardly eats anything. Like at all.<\/span><\/p>\n

The Fitness Fanatic Mum<\/span><\/h2>\n

She has so much energy; looks great even in track pants and her kids have healthy, nutritious lunch boxes. (Tinkies for mine)<\/span><\/p>\n

Overachiever Mums<\/span><\/h2>\n

The ones doing extra mock exams so their kids excel; those that throw huge, perfectly planned parties and those that remember every single thing that I have diarised but never remember to look at.\u00a0 The winners at every sports event, the tireless, never moody ones and the I-told-you-so ones.<\/p>\n

No Mum is Perfect<\/span><\/h2>\n

Now I know what you\u2019re thinking. I\u2019m so judgmental and yes I am, but not how you think.\u00a0 I know in the back of my mind that these mums are not as perfect as I make them out to be.\u00a0 That sometimes they also cry themselves to sleep because it was a rough day. That sometimes they might have road rage for no reason and regret it almost instantly.\u00a0 That somewhere in the world, someone else also forgot to make change for that tooth fairy deposit under the pillow.<\/span><\/p>\n

So maybe this is my way of getting someone to say “Everything’s going to be OK”. That I shouldn\u2019t be too hard on myself (unless I leave my kid at Woolies again) and that I should give myself credit for the little things I do. Like bedtime stories with all 3 kids cuddled in my bed, even the teenager. Like special request dinners and helping colour-in when my son\u2019s arm is sore.\u00a0 Like game nights with popcorn and milkshake, and laughing together till our stomach\u2019s hurt, praying together and discussing the values of being a good person. And yes, making up mock exams and comprehensions, helping with assignments and having drawing competitions with my daughter. Priceless.<\/span><\/p>\n

This article was originally written for Jozikids by Fatima Kazee in 2019.<\/em><\/p>\n

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